Weekly Check In's and Facing Fears.

As you've noticed by now the blog has taken on the new name of 'Oh the Places You'll Go'. As I set off on new goals, new journeys, new opportunities, and new challenges I've been really challenged to realize that I've got some pretty big fears to face in the next 16 months. The next 16 months are what I'm calling 'phase one' of my new life plan and I can't totally explain that but suffice to say it's going to be a year of living almost completely outside of my comfort zone.

I posted to facebook Monday morning the following quote:

Your greatest regret at the end of your life will be the lions you didn't chase. You will look back longingly on risks not taken, opportunities not seized, and dreams not pursued. Stop running away from what scares you most and start chasing the God-ordained opportunities that cross your path. - Mark Batterson, In a Pit with a Lion on a Snowy Day

I chose my sweet friend, Auburn, as my accountability for 'phase one' because she's in a similar stage of life herself. She's the person I can talk about all the things you're never supposed to talk about...like just how much money you make, have, save, and spend. Growing up neither of us came from families that talked in length about money specifics so I think this has been a bit of an adjustment for both of us but if you're going to make lofty goals, you need accountability, right? Aubs and I took Dave Ramsey's course 'Financial Peace University' together (actually, I'd taken it and when I taught it I made her be in my group) and we know the value of laying it all on the line with someone.

We've started a weekly 'check in' e-mail to chart the progress we're making on several goals (many of them right now related to living on a budget and saving for some future goals). There are about a million things I love about my friendship with Aubs but I'll tell you what - she is one of the msot encouraging people I've ever been blessed enough to be friends with. She has been my biggest cheerleader these past 2 years in everything from my weight loss to my finances to my relationships to tough conversations with family members or friends. She really knows me and amazingly, still thinks I'm great. I continue to be blown away with how blessed I am to have her.

If you're in a 'phase one' of some big plans here's my advice - celebrate your victories. Every week Aubs and I take a time out to celebrate all the things we've done right that week to get to where we want to be. That doesn't mean I don't occasionally have to confess I cheated on my budget or skipped a workout BUT it does mean that every week I get to feel good about what I got right, even if I have to own up to a few screw ups too. Celebrate it. Life's tough and it takes hard choices and sometimes painful sacrifices to get ahead - so don't forget to give yourself a pat on the back regularly so you'll be encouraged to stick with it!

I put my big girl pants on this weekend and got a few things done I'd been leaving on the back burner. You know how that is. I sat down and really looked over my benefits and made some decisions about my dental insurance, my FSA account, mailed in some documents to my investment account peeps, changed over my card numbers for my car insurance, etc. Then I took my big girl pants back off, sat down and watched the Proposal with Ryan Reynold. Mmm, that was a reward for wading through all that adult crap.

Time v. Money.

Time is money and money is time. So how do you determine which is more important? What is a good balance between saving time and saving money? It’s easy to err on either side. Many spend too much money to save time and end of crippling their finances while others spend so much time obsessing about saving they forget to have a life outside. I can think of someone who fits each category and another who’s balance of the two inspires me.

I could probably write a novel about my thoughts on this topic but I’ll spare you that much reading this evening and we’ll just cover a few things that as I pondered this, came to mind. Starting with, I worry less about saving on items or events that have sentimental value. My best friend’s wedding, a trip to see my sister(s), a good digital camera, unlimited long distance so I’m never cutting anyone off, etc. These lasting memories, filled with the people who mean the most aren’t worth saving a few bucks over. This is the category I do not skimp in.

Another category I don’t torture myself over is books. While my Mom constantly argues that with as much as I read I should be hitting up the library – I just can’t do it. I love to own books. What if it’s a great book I want to lend out? What if I want to write in the margins or underline my favorite quotes? And most recently since I added a Kindle to my daily life – it’s just freakin convenient! I can download a book while waiting for a flight to my next event and have it read by the time I get back. Can a library do that for you? I think not. For the time it would take me to library it several times a week and keep track of those dates, I spend the money instead of the time.

For now, I don’t deprive myself of cable TV. While I’m more than willing to admit that it’s not a necessity – I live alone and enjoy being able to hit up the Tivo on the off chance that I have a few minutes to do nothing. I also like to catch up on my favorite shows or let’s be honest, Sportscenter while I pack my lunches for work or do dishes at night. I’m just not at a point right now where I think it’s worth giving up. I pay extra to have a DVR so that I can watch what I want, when I want. Could I go to a friends to watch my favorite shows? Sure. But again, this is a time over money issue for me.

Groceries are a great area to care enough to save in. A. It’s freaking easy! With sites likewwww.southernsavers.com that map out the savings for the stores in your area and inserts like Publix sends in the mail, saving is made easy. Plus, who really wants to eat all the extra money in their budget? If you can do buy 1 get 1 deals and clip a few coupons to make room in your budget for an extra trip with a friend per year or a much needed, larger memory card for your camera – why not? So I spend time here, keeping up with the sales so I know when to buy what and where. I also spend time getting the newspapers on Sundays and clipping the needed coupons before I head to the store every week. It does cost me some time BUT I get tons of totally free items and plenty of groceries under $1! Worth it.

Gifts. Now before you go off on me about being stingy, hear me out. When you need to buy a gift for a wedding, birthday, etc it seems to be that time is of the essence and in the interest of saving time you spend more money. For example, if you buy a gift card for a wedding you feel totally awkward spending less than say, $25, right? BUT you could find an awesome gift at say, Ross or Homegoods for $10-12 if you thought ahead to make a trip. It requires a bit more time and effort but if you saved $15 bucks on each gift you bought throughout the year, that could really add up. I’m not saying buy the first cheap trinket you can find but I am saying think through thoughtful, useful, thrifty gift giving ideas! Save money, not time on gifts.

Beauty. Oh yes, I just went there. Now in the past I’ve had $50 haircuts and $15 haircuts and if I’m being honest – the quality was quite similar. The difference throughout the year if I get my haircut every 8 weeks (which I do) is $227.50 per year. On top of that, I use to get my hair colored. Not because I have grey hair or a particularly terrible natural color, just to ‘change things up’ from time to time. Turns out, you can buy professional color at Sallys for about 5 bucks (including the processor) and they’ll teach you how to mix the exact color you want while you’re there. For those of us use to paying 100+ dollars every 6-8 weeks, this is life altering. I later decided to go natural again, which I have done now BUT I did save quite a bit of money throughout my crazy hair color days in college by learning to mix my own color.

Beauty savings aren’t limited to hair though. You can get a facial at a beauty school for about 20 bucks (give or take) – instead of 60-100 at a salon. If you’re trying to overcome skin problems as I once was, these can really help clear you up! They’re also amazing and relaxing…just fyi. This applies to waxing, pedis, manis, and sometimes even massages. I will say that because they’re still learning and have to be checked by an instructor is take more time to get your hair, etc done by a student over a salon professional but the money you save is worth the extra time – at least to me. For hundreds of saved dollars in a year and the freedom to continue to enjoy some spa days without guilt; I do my research and I go to affordable priced locations.

DIY? I figured out a year or so ago that I enjoy doing some small maintenance on my own vehicle (a Toyota Corolla). Buying a $10 inside air filter at Discount Auto Parts actually saved me $25 in installation pay. How did I know how to change it? Youtube. You can learn just about anything on the internet these days. I change my inside and outside air filters on the regular now. Maybe being your own grease monkey doesn’t thrill you but you may find another area you don’t mind being handy in.

My most recent discovery for savings? Know your benefits. Turns out that if you dive into your benefits on your insurance plans website you may find that you’re missing out on services that you essentially pay for. For example, my work has vision insurance which I opt into having since I’m blind as a bat (no really, blind). Once per year I get a $5 exam AND $180 towards new frames with only a $10 copay for lenses. If I hadn’t realized this in time to snag my ‘free’ glasses for this benefit calendar year, I would have lost them come June! Check your plans – you may find that you’re missing out on ‘included’ items that you should be taking advantage of!

OK, there’s your time v. money thoughts of the day. Feel free to share some of your own with me in comments, I love other people’s money pointers. I’m always trying to be more efficient.

Love,
B

Whoever said pale was the new tan...

Three day weekend starts now! Work was generous enough to give us good Friday off this year, which I’ve never had off from a job before. I was pumped for a three day weekend, with not too much on my plate this weekend. My one must accomplish task this weekend that I’m forcing myself to get done at 9am tomorrow is my taxes. Anyone else dread this process? I had a lovely H&R Block rep last year (though he was very flirty with me even though my Mom was present…awk). I have no reason to hate this process since for the second year in a row I have something funky on my taxes (this year it’s a new condo!...qualifying me for the 8K tax credit) so someone else will actually be DOING my taxes this year. I do however, dread this process a bit.

Anyone doing anything fun with their returns this year? A few of my friends have bought fabulous new clothes or purses. I’m taking the responsible route this year and paying down my ‘mortgage’. Ah, being a big girl. Tough stuff. But I do like to make progress and that’ll take a pretty decent sized chunk off what I owe to be house debt free (a goal of mine). Maybe my attitude towards taxes this year is lackluster because I know I won’t get to play with any of the extra money coming back in. Yeah, that’s probably it.

I plan to spend the majority of my weekend by the pool enjoying the high 70s and sunny weather we will be having in the TPA this weekend. Whoever said pale was the new tan (I believe this was Marie Claire?) was ‘seriously disturbed’ (mean girl voice). When I get pale I look ill. Not a fan. I look so much healthier with a glowing tan. Before anyone gives me a skin cancer lecture, I use sunscreen every time I lay out (despite that my Hawaiian skin doesn’t actually burn) and I get my skin checked once per year. So, relax friends.

Some of you know I lead a group for Dave Ramsey’s Financial Peace class (personal finance). I’m going tonight to get a desperately overdue haircut from a group member of mine who just struck out on her own and rented a room. I’m so proud of her and headed up north to show my support after work. If any of my Tampa girl (or guys) want an inexpensive haircut, she’s very reasonably priced and conveniently located at Bearss & Dale Mabry. So let me know if you want her contact info, and I’ll let you know how my hair comes out. ; ]

Other than haircuts, taxes, and tans – I plan to win a few games of Spades against friends late tonight & see my boy Daniel Mogg (he’s a DJ too, if you ever need one) dominate on the baseball fields tomorrow evening at the University of Tampa. Daniel was an intern at Family First in the first round of interns that started after I joined the staff. I’ve missed him every day since he finished his internship in December, he was seriously the most fun guy to have around the office. So, I’ll be hitting up the baseball game with my friend (and coworker) Candace tomorrow night to watch him win.

Last and certainly least selfishly, I will be volunteering at the Laundry Love Project tomorrow morning doing laundry for those going through some hard financial times. The best part about this is that it is entirely less daunting to help someone else do their laundry then to actually face the walk-in closet full of dirty clothes I need to wash at my own place. You can read about my first LL experience here for more deets.

I will spend Sunday celebrating the greatest gift of all – Christ’s son. For me & my fellow Christians easter is about way more than a bunny (and chocolate). I will be celebrating with my home church, Grace Fam as well as spending the day brunching and poolside with my girl Auburn. I hope that as you have a restful weekend you too remember what this weekend is all about. Thank the Lord we don’t always get what deserve…

Love,
B

Check up, Check In.

I wanted to take a blog post to catch you up on my personal life. Most of what I blog isn't directly related to my everyday life so from time-to-time I like to pause in the chaos of my thoughts, suggestions, and musings to just tell you what I am up too. Today, will be that day.

The Family.

I was recently blessed with a quick visit from the parental units. They popped through Tampa for a quick spend-the-night in the condo (their first time seeing it) before heading to a couples retreat for the rest of the weekend in the Naples area (my Mom said Naples my Dad said Ft Meyers...I'm not really sure where they were). It was a hilarious time of my Dad wandering the condo repeating over and over how 'quality' my place feels & how much he 'loves the Spanish architecture'. Mom noticed the places I missed cleaning and started making a list of fix it, buy it, or polish it projects for her next visit.

Dad, who opted for the airmattress in the guest bedroom proceeded to wake half my complex screaming about the high quality (of course) of my airmattress, to which I had to remind him about 20 times that night to stop yelling down the hallway, I share walls with my neighbors! Mom and I enjoyed a slumber party in my room talking about all of our ideas for decor in the coming months.

I recognize how incredibly blessed I am to have such wonderful parents. I love every minute I get to steal with them in whichever state, game, hotel, or work event is so happens to be. I'm grateful that despite the distance, I'm spoiled rotten with seeing them every 2 months or so.

The Workplace.

In work news, we're about 6 weeks out from our first NFL event of the season. The down time was appreciated to learn the ropes, catch up on the less pressing tasks, and prep for this year. I am however, glad to be getting back at it. We will kick off the Spring Event Season with our Tampa FKE at Raymond James Stadium on April 24th. I'm back in touch with vendors and working towards what I'm confident will be a great event, featuring our own, Coach Tony Dungy as the speaker!

I'm anxiously awaiting the finalization of the date for our spring event with the Indianapolis Colts, of course. I will be letting those of you in Indiana know when I will be headed that way, in hopes that I will be able to find some time with a few of you while I'm there. I look forward to my times in Indy to catch up with my parents, my buds at the Colts, and my darling friends who still remain up that way.

The Blogfront.

I'm excited to say that my 'little blog' has really taken off in the past few months. I've received a few exciting offers lately. One from my a book distributor who would like me to link the books I read to the option to purchase from their website, in return I would get paid. I'm in touch with them but at this point have made no conclusive decisions. I try hard to protect this space where we can 'chat' and communicate - I do not in any way want it to be overrun with ads or things of that nature. The offer is flattering and I continue to consider the option. I guess you'll figure out sooner or later if this works out.

As you know from my 'Party Planner Diary' series, I'm in the process of planning a party that is to be sponsored by Dove. Edelman's out of Chicago and I have stayed in touch since my last blog adventure with them and we now are joining forces on another Dove related adventure. Exciting times for me, as the last Dove experience I had converted me to Dove deodorant AND exfoliating body wash as well as got me giving myself regular 'piticure's. I love their products and the ladies of Edelmans have been a delight to work with, both times. I'm only sorry they won't actually BE at this event.

I do have several giveaways coming up! As I do some Random House book tours, I will give away a copy of a few of the books I will be reading. Also, courtesy of Dove, several of my readers will get free product as well. You're the reason I get these offers, I can't leave you high and dry! So be watching for my freebie posts. I would like to keep fairly regular giveaways on my blog for you all, as a thank you for all that you contribute to my life!

Lastly in 'blog news', I received my first gift from a reader. One who was incredibly insightful in her gift choice and sent me this...

Thanks to Shawn, a darling friend and reader who is currently on deployment. You were so sweet to think of me and send me such a thoughtful, adorable gift. My coworkers also thank you as they will no longer have to hold the door for me as I flash in and out packing for events. You have no idea how handy this gift really is in my work life. Thank you, thank you, thank you from the bottom of my heart for your friendship, readership (is this a word?), and your thoughtful gift!

Personal Life.

I've been insanely occupied by my reading the past week or so. This week that includes staying up entirely too late for a work night, reading Shutter Island. I'm attempting to finish this book before I go see it with friends Wednesday night. If you're already seen the movie you can tell me if you do or don't like it but don't spoil it for me, I heard it's different from the book!

I'm anxiously awaiting a few days off to 'beach it' with my best friend Candy on her spring break from grad school. Along with 5 days of vacation together, I'm getting excited for her wedding this Fall! I tried on my bridesmaids dress last week (floor length!). The dresses are orange, which I think is a fabulous choice although I really better stay on top of my tan game this summer by my new pool! She bought a beautiful wedding gown last week. So exciting. I love weddings. And dancing at receptions! Note: I'm a terrible dancer.

My Small Group (through church) just had their first visit to the condo. With all around stamps of approval we're now planning a sleepover there soon. It's so wonderful to finally have a place of my own, to myself, to have people over too. I never feel alone there. I enjoy the quiet when I get it and I have great friends who find ways to invite themselves over the rest of the time. I love that about them.

I'm hosting several gatherings at the condo in the next few months so I've been excited with the progress there. I now have seating! My steal of a find on Craigslist (originally from Scan Design) couch has been a smashing success. I'm anxiously awaiting my Mom's visit during which we're going to upgrade the blinds, repaint my trim, and touch up my walls. She also volunteered to make me curtains and buy me a few things (like a rug) that I'm still lacking. Isn't she the best? Anyway, Mean Girls, Dove Events, and House-warming parties oh my!

Also this month my cousin, Wesley will be down this way playing some baseball for Hamilton College. Can't wait to see him and hopefully my Aunt Ju and Uncle David while they're here watching. I'm glad that Spring Break beings influxes of friends and relatives my way!

Monday nights I'm now co-facilitating a group for the Dave Ramsey class at church, Financial Peace University. Mandy (my co-leader) and I have the best group, I'm sure of it. The first week we had a cookout and got to know everyone. Last night we kicked off Lesson One on saving and how to 'pay yourself first'. Two of our group members are already paying off g's (thousands) of debt. This group knows how to get after it. I love that about them. I'm confident I will learn as much from them as they learn from me, possibly more.

I really need to face H&R Block and get my taxes done this weekend. Gr. I don't know why I'm dreading doing my taxes, especially since I was a first time home buyer in 2009 so my return will be happy.

Ok, I think that's enough about me.

Love,

B

Second Jobs.

I've been having countless conversations with friends these past few weeks about the pros and cons of getting a second job. Now that I've taken a financial class and am signed up to help facilitate a group for next term, my friends think I am now the expert. False. But I do have some opinions about this subject from both personal experience and from that of the results of my friends.

So, if you're considering a second job as a means of getting ahead financially, saving more, having more disposable income, or paying off your debt - lets chat. When I moved to Tampa I became obsessed with the idea of being debt free and financially responsibility. I was 2 days out of college and already feeling overwhelmed with all that was ahead of me. My solution? I got a second job.

Now, for me this was a great experience. I was making an extra 500 bucks per month in cash that I was chucking straight towards paying off my car. I was able to pay it off in less than a year, at which point I got rid of my second job. Because the goal was not to get rich by never having time or energy. The idea was to work hard for a period of time to get myself out of the hole. Once that was achieved I was ok to let go of my second income and live simply.

Here are my cautions about second jobs:

They will zap you of time and energy. This often times results in counter productivity. When you're tired and busy you are more likely to spend money eating our or doing takeout (bad for the wallet AND the waistline). You are more likely to impulse buy due to higher level of stress. It is easy to let your 'real job' suffer because you don't have as much left to give. This can really be a trap that keeps you from promotions or advancement. You do not want this to happen. Lastly,you are more likely to hate your life because you don't really get to have one...

But if you're going too...

Second jobs can be a great way to meet short term goals! Taking a 'seasonal job' to help fund Christmas shopping or a summer job to offset the cost of books for school are great examples. For me it was paying off my car because I hated the idea that really someone else owned my car because of debt. For quick fixes you can bear down, be serious, and really put 100% of your extra income towards your goal. But be willing to let it go when it's over...life is too short to work around the clock.

Oh last word of caution...if you're trying to get a second job to get ahead do not choose somewhere in which you will spend as much as you make! Example: I once got a 'for fun' job at Coach (handbags). I loved that job. Everything about it. But I loved the discount the most...so much so, that I'm pretty sure they MADE money off my working there. So friends, be smarter than the 18-year-old version of me.

Love,
B

Paycheck decisions.

How should your paycheck be split up?

According to a KipTip in January Kiplinger's Personal Finance magazine you should divide it as follows:

Mortgage/Rent: 30%

Food: 15%

Debt: 10%

Utilities: 10% 

Transportation: 10%

Savings: 10%

Clothing: 5% (Ouch)

Entertainment: 5%

Misc: 5%

This makes sense to me, though I do mine a bit differently.  You have to personalize this but there is wisdom in watching your percentages.  You don't want 50% of your income going to housing and 20% to clothing (well, you may want that).  Watch where your money is going and make sure that if you're percentages are out of whack, you reevaluate how to get back in track.

Hope this helps.  Happy budgeting friends.

Love,

B

That'll do it.

This post is inspired by a conversation I had with a coworker & by my fellow blogger Ebony Jewel 's commitment to blogging daily for a month with posts that will help others. Thanks for inspiring me ladies!

My coworker & I were discussing money and how easy it is to not save because 'there's no money left'. How many of us have fallen into that trap? If I had to pinpoint the primary reason that until taking Dave Ramsey's class I never saved money, it would be that 'there was never any left'.

The problem with putting it that way, is the lack of ownership. The reason we have no money left is because we don't have a plan, guildlines, a cut off number. Hince: budget. If you plan how much money you are allowed to spend per month in catagories, then you plan to have money to save. Also, MOST finance professional's will tell you the only way to get ahead financially is to quit waiting til the end to pay yourself and start paying yourself first! Personally I've learned to do it this way...I tithe (give to my church) first, pay myself (save), and then I use the rest of what I have from that paycheck to filter through catagories such as: living (rent), car insurance, saving for my next car, haircuts & facials, etc.

Much like getting the laundry done or picking up a wedding present, if you don't make plans to do so - 'shockingly' you don't get it done. Don't allow your money to slip through your fingers!

Now, some of you may not have the time (right now) or the money perhaps to take a finance class. So, I wanted to offer a little freebie help. You can send your thank you's to Kiplinger.com for providing this great FREE household budget tool.

I'm a subscriber to Kiplinger Personal Finance magazine. I signed up with them shortly after reading 'The Money Book for the Young, Fabulous, and Broke' at the beginning of the year. Once I got the ball rolling with my finances, it felt good to finally understand money. I got thirsty for more information. Kiplingers has provided me great information about investments, mutual funds, the best banks, credit cards, etc. I've even begun to follow them on Twitter for daily tidbits.

I know that it's overwelming to think about budgeting, especially when spending money is so much more fun. But I promise, once you start building good habits - it gets easier!

Want more resources? I've turned to these experts for help to kicking my shopping habits and start being the master of my own financial destiny:

Buckle up.

I have laughed, joked, and even experienced a few growing pains with you all as I've strapped myself in to this Financial Peace class. Determination to not continue the vicious cycle of living paycheck to paycheck for the rest of what I hope will be my long life. But I had a long way to come friends. And though I have worked hard and come a long way in a short amount of time - I still have a long road ahead. My friends would have said all a long that 'compared to them' I'm good with money. For my age, I admit I'm a bit ahead of the game in that I've gotten myself out of debt and I'm really 'making it'. BUT I'm raising the bar to include being financially responsible. Not just living in 'survival mode'.

Here are a few notes from my recent experiences that I wanted to share with you all - that I hope will encourage you towards peace in your own financial life.


This will make many of you laugh - but I tried couponing for the first time this week. At first it was horribly overwelming so if an over-enthusiastic friend tells you it's easy: they're lying. It's mildly terrifying at first. My friend Jen and I (who are taking the class together) bought the paper for 2 weeks before we actually cut and used a coupon because we were overwelmed. We've been using a site called http://www.southernsavers.com/ although the class recommends 'the grocery game'. But I don't want to pay money for a membership, to save money. That seems mildly counter-productive.

The purpose of using a couponing site is that it does the leg work for you. I saved right around $100 my first week of couponing. Between CVS, Walgreens, and Publix (grocery). The drama and trouble of couponing may not be worth it for 5-10 bucks but for 100?...hand me the scissors!

I will confess that I was having a little bit of a pride issue with this whole couponing this so the first time I went, I went at 10 at night (to Walgreens). There was no one there so it wasn't as awkward or weird - and by the next day I could coupon in broad daylight! : ] Success.

I have a guest blogger that will be posting soon about her own site to help people save money - so be excited for that in the future!

Having been on the completely plastic plan for a few years now - I just reexperienced carrying cash. For the first couple days I had a hard time even remembering that I HAD cash with me. Sad? Perhaps. But a week into I know for a fact I've spent less money than I did in the weeks prior, simply by not swiping a card and disassociating my actions with 'spending money'. I feel a little lighter after confessing that.

I was confessing to the girls in my bible study that now that I finally stopped just praying that God would provide for me and start realizing he was providing for me - I was just doing a poor job of managing his provisions I feel relieved! And inspired. I keep revising and revising my budget to save more. The success really is a great feeling. I wish it for everyone.

I had to skip class this week to work a Tony Dungy appearance in Clearwater, FL (I blogged about that yesterday) - so I missed the lesson on dumping debt. But I will be doing the the reading this weekend so I will share with you about that soon.

Love,

B

Money talk.

Ok as you all are well aware I'm taking a Dave Ramsey class so money is going to be on my mind for another oh, 16 weeks or so.  So we will be talking about it.  It seems from my last few posts that most of you are experiencing similar situations to what me and my friends are.  Therefore, you have some interest in getting ahead financially as well.  So, hopefully you'll enjoy this journey with me and if not - well, bare with me because there will be other posts as well.

Here are the lies we're going to quit telling ourselves:

- 'if I just made more money...'  This lie has gotten the best of all of us at some point in our young adult lives.  If we just made more money we'd ...save more, give more, invest more.  Let's get real right now and say that as we've made more we have....SPENT more.  That's the truth right?  When we made nothing we spent less than we do now.  In college we spent more than in high school and when we graduated college we spent more than in college.  As we make more we spend more.  Most of us, sadly do not do any of the other things in a larger dose.  We continue to tell ourselves that when we make more we will...that cycle needs to be broken.

 

- 'I just need to get married'  Have you all used or heard this one?  Then my husband (or wife) can take care of the money.  Or 'then we'll have 2 incomes'.  With 2 incomes come other 2's.  2 cars.  2 student loans. 2 credit card debts.  If we don't get our finances right while there's 1, it will only be that much harder when there's 2.  Remember that.  Math rarely gets easier when the numbers get bigger people.

I'm going to go out on a limb here and say that I know the number one lie that 20-somethings tell themselves.  Dave Ramsey addresses it but I'm going to venture out on a limb and say this really is the main lie that we as young and possibly singles buy into...

'but I DESERVE it'  if this is a lie that you tell yourself: stop.  Right now.  Because if you didn't earn the money to PAY for it, than you don't deserve it.  Sorry.  I know you work hard.  I know that your life sucks at times.  I know that you're busting it.  I know that it looks great on you.  But if you can't afford it then quit telling yourself you deserve it.  I've watched countless friends justify cars, tvs, apartments, homes, vacations, clothes, you name it.  Don't be one of them.  If you can't afford it then don't tell yourself you deserve it...earn it so you can enjoy and pay for it only 1 time, in cash.

Getting ahead financially is hard.  There is no get rich quick scheme that will solve all your problems.  Even those who win the lottery are often back out pumping gas a few years later because if we don't learn about money when we have little we still won't understand it when we have lots.  Principles of money have to be learned, they do not show up when your paychecks hit a certain level.

If were going to get down and dirty with budgeting we've got to start by cutting the crap.  We make what we make, we are what we are, and we don't deserve it until we've earned it.  Those are the cold, hard facts.

The one and only 'debt' that is allowed in the Dave Ramsey lifestyle is a mortgage (1...not 2).  So if the bank owns your car, then remember that you don't.  And if the bank owns your wardrobe through credit card debt, than guess what - it's not yours.  If this is the case than you neither earned them nor 'deserve' them.

If you feel depressed now than you're probably in a good place to start redoing your habits with me.  It's time to buckle down and take control because 'you have to gain control over your money or the lack of it will forever control you'.

Let's get it girls.

Love,

B

Shopaholic meets Uncle Dave.

Whether you know me in real life or blogworld you probably know me well enough to have figured out I'm more of a spender than a saver. Some may even term me a professional consumer. I buy what I want, usually at the exact moment I decide I want it. Now, I do maintain a high enough level of self control to keep myself out of trouble - but until recently not enough to ever get ahead.

I am not however content to continue to be subpar. It is not enough to simply survive in the world, I want to conquer. For me success in the world of finances doesn't mean getting rich, it means being financial stable and secure. Ready even for the unexpected. Above crisis. Prepared. Or to simplify - it means not having to answer the question, 'if you had a 5,000 dollar crisis where would you get the money' with a sheepish - 'Call my Dad and ask to borrow?'.

The course I'm taking teaches to you to live below your means now so that later you can 'live like no one else'. It is important to me to be a good steward of what God has entrusted to me and I would be lying if I said that I have always cared about that. Honestly, I think for many years (mostly high school and college) I thought that being a 'good steward of my money' was directly related to' being lame and going without everything I wanted'.

Wrong.

As every consumers pet, I like to have the best, the newest, the now. The problem however is not what I want but when I want it. The Dave Ramsey program is teaching me that you don't have to go without what you want, you have to wait until you can truly afford it. Not afford it in the sense that there's enough money in your bank account, enough money in the right category. Can I go on a cruise if I want? Absolutely! But it must come from a budget category that holds vacations (ie: entertainment) and the money must be available before I pay for the cruise (not charged and later paid off or borrowed from other categories).

All you shopaholics out there are grimacing right along with me. Waiting. What a horrible, horrible concept. We love the instant gratification of having it before others, when we want it, and to wear or use the very next day! Am I right? So how am I ever going to learn to delay my desires until their budgeted and saved for? Another word we shopaholics hate - discipline!

I must learn to limit my spending to only a pre-determined amount. Stay tuned for updates as I try'n face facts on the catagories that are out of control.

Love,

B

Ps: Check at the bottom of my sidebar for a financial check up and see if you're on the right track. According to my plan, I could have over 6 million dollars in savings by the time I'm 65 (with the interest included). Don't you see why I like Dave now?! : ]

Thoughts from tonight's reading.

I went out and got a diet coke and did my Financial Peace University homework tonight and two main thoughts jumped out at me.  I thought I would share them with you.  More on my journey from shopaholic to financial stability coming soon.  For tonight I'll give you 2 great quotes from Dave Ramsey's book - 

'You must gain control over your money or the lack of it will forever control you.  If you don't take action continually on your money, it or the lack of it will take action on you'.

Also, 'measure your wealth not by the things you have, but by the things for which you would not take money'.

Food for thought.

Love,

B

Time management.

If you're a reader than inevitably you hear people say regularly, 'Oh, I wish I could read but I just never have the time'.  The truth is that there are 24 hours in all of our days, how we use them is up to us.  If you find yourself saying that you wish you had the time for an activity, hobby, sport, or educational experience - well, then perhaps you should reevaluate how you could.  

An equally popular comment is that 'people have time for what the value'.  Isn't this true?  You may think you're too busy to read or workout but somehow you manage to eat 5 times a day.  Hmm.  You don't have time to cook or clean but amazingly you spend an hour and a half per day doing your hair and makeup.  None of these things are bad.  I just feel it's important to call a spade a spade.  What I don't do, is a result of a lack of priority in my life.

Many of us have commitment issues.  We'd love to take a class, join a group, maybe volunteer?  But EVERY week seems so daunting and permanent; we shrink back in fear.  Giving in the to the 'what if' game we convince ourselves that we can't possibly commit to one more thing!  Is this starting to hit home for you?  This is the land I've lived in friends...do not feel alone.

I recently stepped down from a commitment that interfered with my new work schedule.  With traveling for work now, Friday nights weren't feasible for me.  Work does trump other commitments to an extend in that at this point in my life I both need to work and love to work.  I'm fortunate to be in a place that I'm excited to be a part of.  However, that doesn't take away from the fact that I was disappointed at having to let go of another commitment.

Almost within the same stride I took on a new undertaking.  For those of you who kept up with my entries last week, you know that I started the Dave Ramsey course at my church.  Dave Ramsey's Financial Peace University includes a several month long commitment, in my case on Thursday nights.  This gave me Monday, Wednesday, and Thursday evening commitments on top of work 5 days a week, traveling a weekend or 2 per month, and church Sundays.  That felt a little overwhelming in my head as I tried to work through whether or not to take the course.

Being financially responsible and more importantly free needed to be a priority in my life.  At 24 years old I'm in a place that many people twice my age would do nearly anything to be in - debt free.  Not being naive enough to believe that I can remain so without a plan, I knew that I needed to make time in my crazy life and schedule to learn.  Learn about saving, budgeting, investing, etc.  So, I signed on and commitment both to myself and my classmates to be there every week I possibly can.

When you make a commitment it's important to stick with it!  Too often we realize something is 'a good idea' but we can't quite be committed to following through.  Am I right?  To gain from the experience we have to really BE there.  In mind, body, and spirit.  Otherwise, we might as well stay home and watch TV.

There's not any one perfect schedule you can map out for your life that will keep you perfectly balanced.  However, it is important to evaluate your commitments from time-to-time to see if your getting the results you want in life.  This includes me.  Some of my commitments to date are book club, small group, financial peace university, work, church, book reviewing, and an accountability partner.  Now, one area I'm still struggling with is working out.  I value the health (and mental stability) benefits of getting my walk/jog in at least in theory...BUT I tend to make time excuses where this is concerned.  I already get up at 6am...5am just seems daunting.  I don't get home til 9pm some nights and by then I'm tired (and a little scared to wander off alone).  So, knowing like I do that we all have the same amount of hours in a day...how am I going to squeeze it in or what needs to give?  That is the question.

You make time for what you want to do.  So perhaps the questions you need to ask yourself are: does what I want right now lead to the future I want later?  What do I say I want to do but don't make time for?  What needs to give in my schedule?  What do I need to move up on the priority list? And if you anything like me...where do I start?

Baby steps. : ]

Love,

B

Enter Dave.

The adventure begins - the adventure being financial peace and freedom from money related stress.  In honor of being transparent here I was able to become debt free about 3 months ago now and I feel great about owning my education and my car...but what now?  I'm newly 24, I want to buy a condo, I have a great new job; how do I keep from screwing up in my finances? 

I started the Dave Ramsey course 'Financial Peace University' tonight with 2 of my gal pals.  You know me, I like to have backup.  Sticking to a budget can be war (between me and my desires) and I wasn't about to go to battle alone.  It is important to have friends who will push you to grow and also allow you to drag them along when you know it's time you grew up.

You may have heard the sayings that money is something that shouldn't be talked about...BUT according to the author of Rich Dad, Poor Dad people who talk about money get money and people who don't, stay poor.  The point of taking this class is not to be rich but to be stable, smart, and responsible.  I know, unpopular ideas for my age range.

One thing that jumped out at me today was this stat - 70% of people in America are living paycheck to paycheck.  Right now, I'm one of them. That's what I want to avoid.  One of the steps that Dave Ramsey helps you through is putting away 3-6 months worth of money incase you ever need it.  That's probably the first big step for me since I don't have debt to tackle.  Budgeting so that I can save and have an emergency fund.  I refuse to live paycheck to paycheck, I'm going to find freedom.

I'll keep you posted as I (of all people) learn to stop spending on everything that catches my fancy.  It's time to start 'acting my wage', Dave Ramsey style.  Note: prayers are accepted...this could get ugly.

Love,

B

Words from the Wise.

One of my favorite suggestions I've reached so far in White's book (see previous entries if you're confused) was to ask your closest friends the following two questions...

- Where do you see me next?
- What do you think would make me happy at this point in my life?

As a 20-something we have to be thinking at least a little ahead. It seems for me and my friends at least, that there are always decisions to be made and changes to be faced. In that, it's important to seek council and most importantly wise council. Don't ask advice from those who will tell you what you want to hear! What's the point? If you're going to do things your own way, then don't waste their time and words. Seek advice from people who will give you open, honest, real responses.

I sent an e-mail to three ladies I most often seek life & career advice from and asked them in their own time, to answer these questions for me. Feeling that their insight would be beneficial as I'm making some life and career choices over the next month. Job related decisions are always difficult and for me, intimidating! Also, I'm facing some decisions about whether or not to move forward with purchasing my first home! This decision is uber exciting but again, intimidating.

The three ladies I chose love me and have been shown to tough love me when I need it and tell me what I may not want to hear but need to hear at that time. For them, I am grateful. Good friends are diamonds in the rough in today's society and I hope it will never be said that I take mine for granted. Having gone through a season of my life full of acquaintances and lacking true friends, I make it a priority to honor them!

Here is some of the advice they gave me... Note: I'm posting this a while after this advice was given as I was waiting until I determined what would happen with the new job. These ladies being some of my best friends knew about it before I could reveal the idea via the Internet, for obvious reasons.

From C: Okay, so where do I see you next. I feel like this is hard because I know what you want next but when I think about it I believe it's who you are and truly where your life is headed. I see you definitely staying in Tampa, and making roots there and finding a home for yourself-so you can be independent :) I see you taking a job with a bigger organization so that you can reach out to more people and feel more challenged and use your gifts fully. I see you possibly continuing your education so you can learn more and gain more knowledge about the world, maybe even in a different area than social work. Even if I knew nothing about the Family First deal I would see you going to something bigger than where you are now. It's who you are!

I think there are a few things that would make you happy right NOW! although i thought a new handbag may be one i decided maybe that's not pertinent :) anyway, i think being independent, financially, spiritually, and mentally is the number one for you. and i totally think you are doing that! I think you are happiest when you feel like you are accomplishing things and making it happen on your own! Although you work awesome with others and recognize what others contribute to your success you like to be free and make decisions on your own and feel confidant in your ability to do so. I think the second thing that makes you happiest is giving. Being able to make a difference for other people and give back to others makes you thrive. You have the most giving spirit of anyone I know, and I personally need to strive to be more like that. So with that said, being in a position (job) where you feel you are making a contribution to people and helping others find happiness would make you the happiest. Finally, learning and growth makes you happy. You are always looking for knowledge and wisdom, especially spiritually, to better yourself. Therefore, any opportunity for you to learn would make you happy.

She knows me so well, doesn't she? It is a blessing to have encouraging, wise, and insightful friends. She allows me to use her as a sounding board and let me just tell you I'm full of thoughts ALL the time. My brain feels like it's on speed sometimes, I can't keep up with all the ideas running through it. C is a fabulous friend and a joy to be around. I wish she was here in Tampa so that I could spend more time with her but of all my friends I moved away from she has probably done the most to ensure that our friendship hasn't suffered in the least from our distance. As you may have guessed, I'm taking much of this advice - including enrolling in a personal finance course for next month and increasing my involvement at church.

Mer as per her normal way had a short but sweet response that including being a 'baller' in the events field with Fam First (I will be pleased if I can just be a baller assistant ; ] ), buying my first home (which is somewhat in the works), and she recommends finding a rich, hot husband at one of the events while I'm at it....easy to see why I love her, huh?

White's book while offering some advice that doesn't sync with my belief and moral systems also gave some great advice about how to keep your life in balance, how to succeed in the workplace, and how to take full advantage of your resources including your best friends. If you're in a place where you have some life decisions coming up or even if you're not - I highly recommend asking these questions of those you trust to help provide guidance in your life. The responses will encourage you and perhaps shed light on your 'next step'.

Love,
B

Money money money!

Dear Suze Orman,

You have ruined all my fun. My savings account thanks you.

Love,

B

So, since being the money nazi to all my friends for the past few months and doing well with my money myself...it was time to take my relationship with financial savvy to the next level. Time to pour over my last 3 statements and add up exactly where my money's been going in June, July, and August.

If you would like to be thoroughly depressed, start here. Despite becoming increasingly better at saving and getting ahead financially, this was still a revealing process. I see now where my money is going and where I need to reevaluate and cut back.

Oh cut backs, no one likes those. But learn now, benefit later - right? For me this starts with eating in. Blah, I know. Eating out with friends is more fun and doesn't require doing any dishes - but there's heck to pay on my budget when it gets out of hand. That's category #1 in the new cutback plan. Thankfully, I have great friends and so, I'm teaming up with some of them to make eating in equally fun and social. Cooking for friends is more fun & still less expensive than eating out...especially when they take turns and cook for you.

Depending on how long you've been reading my blog you may already know that I've been on a finance kick since the New Year. I decided 2009 was my year to dominate the world of personal finance. 5 books and a few budget cuts later I'm debt free and saving hard. BUT in the name of being a life-long-learner I am signing on to take Dave Ramsey's 'Financial Peace University' class at my church next month.

Dave Ramsey is one of the few guru's I haven't explored yet. I hear however, he's quite the extremist. The cut-up-those-credit-cards-and-live-in-cash types. Hmm, we shall see. On that note, one of the best things I've done for myself in 2009 is use my credit card. Now before you let your imagination run away with you, listen up. I have never paid interest on a credit card, ever. I pay it off. I use my credit card and then I pay it off weekly online. Why? Because I'm all for getting something for nothing. My credit card points have earned me all sorts of rewards and it hasn't cost me a cent.

My disclaimer is this, until you've gotten yourself under control financially - don't try this at home. Plenty of people have used credit with the best of intentions and gotten themselves in trouble. If this is your struggle than my game plan is not for you. However, if you're good on a budget and can tell yourself no, it's a great way to get some freebies.

I've studied my money, money, money this weekend and now it's back to the grind.

Love,

B

Young, Fabulous, & Broke.

If you find yourself often complaining about the state of your finances, I have just the book for you!  Suze Orman is my absolute HERO!  Homegirl didn't just start with nothing and work her way into a sizable fortune, but she started in the negatives. She was in over her head in debt and she fought her way out with some basic money principles she now writes about as a career.

The Money Book for the Young, Fabulous, and Broke is by far my favorite of the 5 or so finance books I've tackled thus far in 2009.  The situation of being 20-something is unique.  While I appreciated the advice in 'Rich Dad, Poor Dad' and 'Rich Dad's Guide to Getting Rich', you have to have money to take on investments such as real estate endeavors.  I'm still a few years from having the stash of cash it would take to embark on such financial adventures as his.

Money is tough in your 20s, especially for those of us in this phase now during the economic crisis our nation is facing.  What I love about Suze is that she gets excited about this phase because we have the distinct advantage of having what most people do not when they decide they want to master their finances - we have time!  Time to fix past mistakes, time to catch up, time to get ahead, and time to conquer.

Ask some of my closest friends (Mer, Alyssa, Candy, etc) and they will tell you that I've clawed my way to getting ahead and pushed them to do the same.  It is HARD to get ahead these days.  For those of us living in expensive places like Florida, it's that much more complicated.  It's not without sympathy that I've pushed them and they me.  Going without to get ahead is not what any of us want to do....but in the end it will allow us to meet long term goals and 'get what we want' when we can afford it.

So here's a few little tidbits for the night.  First, saving in your 20s is a novel idea.  How many of your 20-something friends even have a savings account?  The answer would probably scare you.  So, if you're not on some sort of saving plan then here's your challenge.  Start saving $100 bucks a month.  Even if this means finding some small extra way to make income.  If you do, after 3 years you'll have saved $3,831.  If you continued this for 10 years you would have saved $14,774!  Now thats what I call progress. So get real with yourself, you can do it.

My other food-for-thought or more of a problem solving thought when it comes to finances comes from a question someone asked Suze that she addressed in her book.  The question reads, ' I am finally making a decent sum of money, but I still have nothing left at the end of the month after paying all my bills'.

Ah ha! So, I'm not alone.  Or wasn't, when this was me a few months ago.  Making more money than ever and still having bare bones in my bank account come end of the month.  Vicious cycle.  If this category includes you here's some advice from the Suz... (page 161 if you buy the book).

You are spending money that you don't even have to impress people you do not even know or like.  It is such a colossal mistake.  When you waste money simply because it's easier to do so, or because you feel you're entitle to it, that is just plain stupid.  And don't feed me that crap that you only live once and you deserve to have fun while you're young.  Hey, there is a ton of fun to be had later, too - when you can afford it!  If you don't make the right choices now, you are going to be so broke when you are older that you will be absolutely miserable.  Look, I'm not going to tell you what you can live without.  you're looking to pare back, not cut out....

If you're having trouble deciding what is good spending and what is bad spending, I ask you to head over to your bedroom closet. Open it up.  Any item you have not worn or used in one year, or that still has its price tag on or is sitting in it's original packaging, is to be placed in the center of your living room.  While you're at it, check under the bed, in the garage, and in your bathroom.  Take out all your unused or hardly used cosmetics, video games, and any sports gear you haven't touch in eons.  Get it all in one big pile.

...when you say you don't know where the money went, a lot of it is sitting unused in your closets.

Guilty as charged.  Any one else squirming in their desk chairs?  My clothes, shoes, and handbags take up not only my room and hall storage but the vast majority of the guest bedroom at the moment.  The money I haven't been saving in the last 23 years can be accounted for with the Carrie Bradshaw quote from 'Sex and the City' - 'I like my money where I can see it, in my closet'.  But, I have to agree with Suze on this one - if I'm not wearing it or using it, it's got to go.

She goes on to recommend that you either Ebay or craigslist these items.  I'll go one further and say that I'm a HUGE advocate of consignment.  I worked at a consignment shop (if you live in Indy visit Carmel Consignment on N Meredian) and not only was it a fabulous job but it taught me how to recycle my designer duds.  While you don't get out of them what you put into them, the payback is considerably better than donating them - and can give you money to put towards newer things you WILL wear, carry, or walk in.

It's not the right path for all of your unwanteds as they are pickier than goodwill or craigslisters BUT if you have a fetish for the fancy like I do, it's a good way to recoup some of your money.

In fact, I've got a place I take to regularly and I've been working on my next laundry basket full of items to take in the next week or so.

Good-luck loves!

B