Not my problem.

I was sittin at home just so
frustrated,aggravated
wondering why I let people make me so crazy
then realized it's my fault by being around
negativity
Cuz I don't have to know them and they don't have
to know me

-- Eden's Crush

It's been on my mind lately that for someone who keeps their life low-to-no drama, I'm frequently sucked into other peoples problems. This is a curse I'm not sure how I acquired. While I want to be a good friend to my closest friends, it's the peripheral people in my life whose problems drain me. I want to offer advice, support, a shoulder but I find myself baring the weight of issues that don't belong to me.

How do you politely tell someone it's their problem? I mean, it is. And while I don't want to be rude or unsympathetic, I also chose to keep drama out of my own life for a reason. It's not worth the thought and effort. I feel drained when I think about the recent friend problems that have been weighing on me. Then it occurred to me over the weekend that I don't owe anyone else my emotions. Getting too involved in their problems was getting ME down. For a best friend this is a given but for others?

Along the same lines I was pondering personal responsibility on a lounge chair by the pool (this is why I blog - my head swirls with ideas). Blame shifting plagues my generation. We take little to no responsibility for our current situations. It's everyone's fault but our own. With this I was reminded of the quote from a recent sermon at church which said, 'You are the sum total of the decisions you've made'. Guess what? Life is hard. For everyone. We make choices. Sometimes the wrong ones. The consequences of our actions bite us in the butt or even kick us when we're down. I find it to be an important first step to realize that we chose our paths in life, for better or worse. The path we chose lead us here. Frequently to get to a better place in life we have to pull ourselves up by our boot straps and do the hard thing, the right thing.

Love,

B