Tuesday, February 28, 2012

Getting a System: Revisited.

I awkwardly borrow this photo from here.

This is a follow up to this post.

What I learned from your comments on my 'getting a system' post, is that many of you are desperate for the same, an organized system that keeps you on top of everything. For those of us who are working at LEAST one full time job (or in my case 1.5) - it's tough to make sure we keep our house company appropriate and our sanity intact! I'm gone 6 nights a week for work, bible study, etc and if I don't keep organized things don't get done.

I wanted to revisit this because there's an aspect to getting a system that I'm still very much a rookie at...this is the friendship portion of having a system. I made 2012 the year of no excuses so I'm no longer allowing myself to use my crazy life as an excuse not to be the kind of friend I desire to be and this includes faraway friends!

I'm not a great phone talker. I usually dodge my phone, especially on the rare nights I actually get to be at home and awake for more than an hour. But I desire to contribute to my long distance friendships and not to be a slacker about 'catching up'. I'm great about sending cards, I do well at face-to-face, and I'm a loyal texter and facebook stalker...but phone calls really are important!

Last night I finally caught up with my sweet friend Jon (if you're on twitter follow him - @JonBausman) he's smart, funny, solid in his faith, and he gives great advice. Jon entered my life in what can only be called God's timing as both of our family went through really similar, tough situations. It is my dream that someday our families will finally meet and we'll be able to tell them how hard we've been praying for them these past 2 years.

I not-so-jokingly shared with Jon last night that he is one of the only people I don't dread calling! I LOVE when we catch up on the phone. I always leave our conversations feeling uplifted, encouraged, inspired, and spurred on towards my goals. That being said, why don't I call him every week? Seriously.

I also had an amazing catch up chat with my original college roommate last night. Alyssa is awesome and again, I love when we catch up but I am an epic failure of a long distance friend at times. Our lives have headed in very different directions both geographically and really, all around. She's up in New Jersey now, married with an adorable son. Obviously I am in Tampa, alternating between refusing to go on second dates and only dating long distance (because it takes less time) and still holding on to the idea that I will never have a child. But as always, halfway through our chat I thought, 'I love this, so why don't I call more often'?

So maybe the answer is that I need a system. Maybe I need some sort of weekly carved out time for phone calls. And maybe I don't actually hate talking on the phone after all, it just depends on who it is?

My first thought is that this may start taking place when I lay out by the pool on Sundays - might as well combine it with something I love, right?

How do you make sure that you stay in close contact with your faraway friends? What do you do to ensure that you're a great friend and not at epic failure like I sometimes am?

I finished off a great night of phone chats and bible study with a fro yo date with my sweet friend Kayla who I am so proud of! We got to celebrate an extension of what was originally a temp teaching job. Couldn't be happier for her and glad I finally got to see her pretty face and hear all about her life.

I raise my coffee (because it's 7am) to all the good friends out there. Make time for what and who is important to you. Don't make excuses because friendships are too important for that. And a special thank you to my patient friends who like me even when I'm a horrible friend!



Established: 2008 said...

I agree. It is so hard to keep in touch with people and it gets worse the farther away they are!

Courtney B said...

I am so with you on this! I dodge phone calls, I'm not good at calling people back, and I don't make time to be a better friend.
But like you, I want this year to be better! I have some amazing friends in my life... and if they take the time out of their busy lives to reach out to me... I can and WILL do the same for them?

Jess... said...

I don't have as many friends that live far away and I'm pretty sure I'm a lot less busy than you... but, since I walk to and from work (10-15 min each way) I call my sister (who lives in Florida) on my way to work and then on the way home I'll usually call a diff friend each night!

Phil and Darby Hawley said...

Once again this is another inspiring post! You're such a great role model :-)

Neely said...

Great post becca! Lots to think about.

MK said...

I've been keeping in contact with my good friends even more now that I have moved hours away from them. I'm also so blessed to have my blog friends that are always around for someone to talk to.